Imagine if you will: you’re home, it’s late at night and you’re pretty much bored out your mind. Everyone you know is probably fast asleep, which means you’re limited on things to do, which for most guys it’s either gaming or queue up a movie (usually in the porn region). You’ve played all you’ve wanted to play so it looks like its gonna be a film after all. Not sure what you wanna watch, you browse through some vids and trailers on YouTube and you come across a trailer for a movie that makes you ask the question “what did I just watch”? That’s not exactly what happened to me, but I am gonna make it easy on you, if you’re looking for late night cheese, because this new film to come my way called "Hit Team" from director Mark Newton and writer Myles McLane; it’s the cheesiest thing I’ve laid eyes on in sometime. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Oh ya, spoilers lie ahead.
Hit Team centers on two of the most inept assassins for hire you've ever laid eyes on – Max (Myles McLane) and Ruthie (Emerald Robinson). Scratch that, they’re not totally inept because Ruthie has some skills (and the body of a goddess), while Max is a total fuck up, who can’t keep his eyes, minds and at one point hands off Ruthie. They’re sent from Las Vegas to Los Angeles by their boss Michael (Douglas Macpherson) to complete a list of hits on six people in a day. They barely succeed in the first three hits, but the last two… well the first one was the wrong person and the second one gets away. Not happy with the turn of events, Michael along with a trio of backup hit men, who have their own personal issues (one likes to rape dead bodies… I’m not kidding!), head to LA to take out Max and Ruthie.
Around the same time Max and Ruthie start killing people (starting with the second hit), the authorities have been alerted and two inept detectives, Akeem (Roger Payano) and another hottie with a body Cynthia (Anita Leeman), are hot on the case. Well… not at first as Akeem believes that the killer is using the bus system to take him to his next hit, so they actually follow a bus until they’re called off to see about a dead hooker. You see where this is going? Crazy, I know! Ultimately the two are able to locate Max and Ruthie from the description of their van. And the whole thing comes to a close as the three groups – Max and Ruthie, Akeem and Cynthia, and Michael and his team square off for the final showdown. Who will come out on top? And what’s the deal with the banana? You’re gonna have to watch the film to find out.
Now I can handle a goofy film, especially if it’s intentional like ThanksKilling, but I’ve also seen my share of over the top humor from watching a lot of Japanese anime. I mean watch the Ranma ½ live-action to see what I mean. It sticks to the source, but the level of humor is way out there. Just like this film - it's way out there! But does that mean it’s any good or is it downright terrible? Let’s find out as we dip into the TOV Breakdown.
For what it’s worth, "Hit Team" is a pretty decent film. The story is solid and easy to follow with a level of humor that’s outrageously over the top. Honestly, after watching the trailer and all the silliness it showcased, I knew deep in my gut I would hate this film when I watched it. But sitting through it, I chuckled more often than I groaned. One of my favorite scenes was when the duo went after this guy Tim; the way he talks to himself and how Ruthie pulls out a really big gun to try and take him out? Priceless! The pacing is nice with not too many lagging parts. And as far as the special effects go, I’ve seem similar in YouTube vids so I have no complaints about that. The acting is laughably and purposely bad; it’s also more in your face while also being way over the top. However this adds to the charm of the film and doesn’t hurt it in the least. There may be a line or too that’s way too stupid, but thankfully not that many that it completely distracts from the experience. PerfectView honors gets a triple shot with Emerald Robinson, Anita Leeman, and leave us not forget the delicious Sprinkles aka Melanie Camp – three bodacious babes that put the “sex” in “sexy”, who also make this outrageous pill that much easier to swallow. In the end, Hit Team is a very well put together dark comedy that doesn’t take itself seriously, and if you can handle goofy at its highest level, then you’ll totally get a kick out of this one.
I find it strange that all these killings and shootings take place during the day and only four cops (I didn’t mention Akeem and Cynthia’s rivals) are ever on the scene. A) Why doesn’t this stuff take place at night and b) where are the rest of the cops? I know this is a low budget flick, but come on let’s get a few more officers in there to make it look… you know what, nevermind.
So question hot shot: do you think you can you handle an over the top dark comedy with a sexy side of fries? Yes, I think you can. And I think when Hit Team gets a broader release you guys will be able to tackle it head on. It’s not perfect, but it’s certainly not disappointing. And for that, out of TOV 5 stars, I’m giving Hit Team a 3.
Update: Hit Team is available on YouTube Pay-Per-View as well as Vimeo On-Demand. Links below.