So I went to see Adam Sandler’s new movie “You Don’t Mess
With The Zohan”. It’s about an Israeli commando who is the best in killing and
capturing villains. He’s called on to catch the Phantom (John Turturro) who is his
Palestinian enemy, but decides to fake his death so he can go to America and cut
hair. He finds a small shop run by a Palestinian female named Dalia (Emmanuelle
Chriqui), gets a job as a hairstylist, and becomes very famous because of his
haircuts and favors he does for them in the back room. Eventually he is
recognized by Salim (Rob Schneider) who remembers him because long ago Zohan
stole his goat so he wanted revenge. Salim tries killing him on his own but
after a fail attempt he decides to call Phantom, who has made a lot of money
with his own chain of fast food restaurants, because he supposedly killed
Zohan. Meanwhile, there is a company own by Walbridge (Michael Buffer, you know
the announcer from all those boxing, wrestling, UFC matches that says, “Let’s
Get Ready To Rumble!!!”) who is trying to buy out the neighborhood that the
hair salon is on and can’t because Zohan is bringing in the money for rent. So
Phantom shows up, tries to kill Zohan, but the fight is stopped by Dalia who
winds up being Phantom’s sister. He then realizes that in America the
Israelis and Palestinans get along (Valkor’s Notes: WTF!!!?) and decides he
wants to follow his dream of selling shoes. They team up to beat Walbridge, who’s
burning up the Israeli buildings so that they think it was the Palestinians. Oh
yea and let me not forget that every chance they get in the movie, they
start to dance Disco. (Valkor’s Notes: WTF!!!?)
The Good
The good thing about this movie was definitely all the
cameos of famous people like Chris Rock, Nick Swardson, Lainie Kazan, Dave
Matthews, Henry Winkler, Kevin James, Mariah Carey, John McEnroe, George Takei,
Bruce Vilanch, and let’s not forget Charlotte Rae as Mrs. GreenHouse (You take
the good, you take the bad, you take them both and there you have the Facts Of
Life!!!).
The Bad
Unfortunately the movie in whole was just not as funny as I
know Adam Sandler can be. It was very long and I just found myself asking when
is it over?
The Ugly
The acting was very plain, we needed more comedy.
I did like the movie but I definitely didn’t love it and I
must give it 3 stars and that’s 1 star just because they packed the movie with
so many cameos; they made the movie that much better. Thanks Mrs. Garrett. This
has been Epic-1 tested and TOV approved.
Peace up out 1
Epic-1
