Never fear, never fear your main man Valkor is here. And I've
got a story to tell, so let me make it perfectly clear. It's about
a film that's so bad ass it'll make ya cheer. It is what it is
and what will be will be. For this next review, I'm takin ya back
ya see. With Michael Jai white and a cast that's out o sight,
I'm gonna talk about a film, a film called Black Dynamite. He
takes to the streets and he kicks all asses; he shakes hands with
the lads and makes sweet love to the lasses. He'll defend ya to
no end, usin up all his might, and the peoples will never forget
the name, the name Black Dynamite. Can ya dig?

That was comin to ya straight from the soul of Bullhorn (played so damn well by Byron Minns).
Ok enough of the rhyming; let's talk about this movie shall we. Black Dynamite tells the tale of, well Black Dynamite; defender of the people and lover to all the ladies. Our story starts outside of a wharf where a young brotha is shot up because he was discovered to be workin undercover. It turns out that this guy is none other than Black Dynamite's younger brother, Jimmy. Who killed him? Why? That's what Black Dynamite looks to find out and he's literally kickin ass and takin names. He hits the streets and he hits the streets hard, but along the way he uncovers other agendas that affect him and his community such as kids getting hooked on smack, Pimps takin on new prospects, he even has time to help start a famous franchise in one of the film's most confuzzled yet hilarious scenes. But when BD uncovers an even bigger plot, bigger than trying to find his brother's killer, bigger than drugs on the street, bigger than drug dealin pimps, he puts it all aside, gathers his minions and sets out to take it down before this most heinous plot unfolds. And believe me it's evil. Will BD save the day? Will he kick a lot of ass? Will he make love to that fine piece of ass Gloria (Salli Richardson)? All these questions and more are answered in this climatic, action pack, and hilarious film known as Black Dynamite.

There have been many films that try to replicate the blaxplotation films of the 70's. Most are nothing more than parodies or spoofs such as "I'm Gonna get you Suck" or "Undercover Brother" which takes ideas from such campy films as Shaft, Dolemite, Jim Kelly, or even Petey Wheatstraw, and endearingly pokes fun of them. But Black Dynamite doesn't half ass it, it takes it all the way; a true send up to those 70's films, from the cinematography, the clothes, hairstyles, even subtle nuances like the film jumping all over the place, character missteps, and super cheesy and sometimes over the top acting, makes Black Dynamite not a spoof or a parody, but a true blaxploitation film for a new era to appreciate. The film is also loaded with cameos from Tommy David's Cream Corn, Phil Morris aka Jackie Childs from Seinfeld who plays Saheed, Arsenio Hall hams it up as a pimp named "Tasty Freeze", Brian McKnight as Sweet Meat, and even Nicole Sullivan as Patricia Nixon, round out this perfect cast.

But what did Brother Val really think of this stone cold fox of a movie?
The Good
Black Dynamite is one bad ass motherfucker of a film that holds you from the beginning and doesn't let go till the end. It feels organic, in the sense that they, the director (Scott Sanders) and company, weren't trying to force the concept on you. Instead everything had a natural flow to it. I haven't been this impressed with Michael Jai White since Spawn, which was a bad film but he did a banged up job. In BD, he plays his role to a tee and looked as though he was having fun doin it too. The crowbar mustache and afro wig definitely complete the picture, but it's the way he delivers his lines that make him a natural for the role of BD, as if he was really born to play this guy. And I do hope there's another film… maybe one involving the south and BD makin love to some white farmer's daughter, with the farmer walkin in, shotgun ready to blow his black ass up? I can hope. The plot is definitely off the wall, but again it's a total send up to 70's films, which had stories just as campy if not even more campy than Black Dynamite's. And the dialogue is just as wacky, which will have you spoutin such lines as "You bet your sweet ass and half a titty" for days. The action is pretty intense as well and so evenly spread out as to keep a good balance of storytelling and guys getting the beatdown. I have to mention the supporting cast. As mentioned before, BD has some great cameos that truly make this film that much more enjoyable. No one person overshadows the other no matter how hard Tommy Davidson hams it up when he is on screen, everyone delivers. The music is also key to the films success; now THAT'S a parody of 70's music as the lyrics follow along with the on screen action, it's hysterical. Finally the ending, which was hilarious and totally on purpose; I simply couldn't stop laughing even well past the credits. Hey, if you can sit through the trash that was Quentin Tarantino's "Death Proof" with all its skip cuts (which was done in a similar style), then you will definitely get a kick out of Black Dynamite.

The Bad
The film needed more kick assery on Kung Fu Island, plus this is where Black Dynamite was supposed to meet his match, only to find that the fight ends even before it begins and there's an even bigger threat than the Fiendish Dr. Wu (Roger Yuan).

The Ugly
Captain Kangeroo Pimp?? WTF!!!?

When all is said and done, I say you must take flight. And go on out and see this great film called Black Dynamite. Its loaded with action, laughs and more, and some sweet titty shots from a couple of whores (not really whores, but it rhymes). So out of TOV 5 stars, I give it a perfect 5; a perfect film and that ain't no jive.